Bizarre Human Behavior.

I was at Subways and the girl making my sandwich went to cut it in half. She cut it really fast, tossed the knife aside, then stopped. She examined the cut, pulling the bread slightly apart, and realized she hadn't cut it all the way. Then she thought about it, continued wrapping it, and put it in a bag.

I could not explain her train of thought.

Cheers,
Diego

The Dark Knight Posters.

In 2005, I was looking at all the cool Batman Begins posters coming out, and I decided that I definitely wanted one. Here were the basic options:

Teaser posters, such as "black and white in cave" and "silhouette."



I generally don't like teaser posters, so I didn't bother with those. I was more into the bat swarm-filled theatrical posters:




I knew I didn't want the one where he's holding Katie Holmes, and I think the one of his head and shoulders was technically, like, the official official theatrical poster, but the one where he's flying overhead with his cape spread was just too beautiful to pass up. So I knew I'd get that one eventually. Then one day they announced that they were pushing up the release date from June 17 to June 15. I immediately ordered the flying cape poster on the chance that I'd get one with the original date, and sure enough, I now have a poster that has the incorrect "June 17" on the bottom. I thought that was kinda cool. I pulled the same trick the following year when they pushed Superman Returns up from June 30 to June 28. So I have a nice display of both incorrectly-dated posters together. I am pleased by things that probably wouldn't please most other people.

Now The Dark Knight is coming out, and I have to think about which poster I want. In December 2007, they put out some domestic and international teaser posters:




Then in April 2008, they released the official theatrical poster (with the burning building), as well as some alternates and extra teaser stuff. I don't know which of it is international or what:





You mightn't know this just from reading it, but I did a fuckload of research just to write this ridiculous post. Anyway, I think I would definitely like to get the official theatrical one of Batman before the burning building. That's basically the only Dark Knight poster I would consider essential display material. Ideally, though, I'd like to also find mini versions of the two teasers of Batman and Joker's backs and use them to replace my two current Transformers mini posters of Megatron and Optimus Prime. The Transformers ones are cool, because they're profile shots (so they're looking at each other), but I didn't really love that movie, so I'm always looking for a new pair to replace them. It's like I'm dating someone I don't really like (so I can get sex while I wait for "the one"). Right now, I think the hypothetical mini versions of the Batman/Joker back teasers are "the one."

So, to recap. I want big theatrical burning building and two mini back teasers.

However. This Friday I was at a store looking at action figures when I saw they had some 22x34 posters for The Dark Knight at five dollars each:



Five dollars for 22x34 posters. That's a fucking deal. So I bought them. They also had the original teaser one of the graffiti on the wall, but I don't much care for that one. I mean, it's painted bricks. I figure I'll take down my big Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life poster and put these two up in its stead. It's a heavy loss, but I still have the original Lara Croft Tomb Raider mini-poster to keep Angelina somewhere on that wall. And I still want the other three that I said.

Mini posters are easy to come by. I get them for free all the time at movie theaters and comic book stores. But it's not often I actually purchase new full-size posters. It seems to only happen now when there's a Superman or Batman movie. Although next year I will probably get at least one Watchmen poster.

Cheers,
Diego

The Length of Things.

It's interesting how people seem to have just organically decided how long everything should be. Songs are a few minutes long, movies are a couple hours long, etc. What if society had evolved in such a way that, organically, we decided songs would be a half hour long? Is it based on societal sensibilities, or is it more biologically based (though of course the two are far from mutually exclusive)? I wonder if there was a society where humans were exactly the same, but the society itself was really different. Or a very similar society, but the humans were way smarter. Would songs and movies be the same length?

Cheers,
Diego

The 2008 MTV Movie Awards.

Tonight I watched the 2008 MTV Movie Awards. I made picks on a ballot beforehand to make it more fun. Here's how I did:

BEST FEMALE PERFORMANCE
MY PICK: Amy Adams, Enchanted
WINNER: Ellen Page, Juno

Whatev. Both were good.

BEST FIGHT
MY PICK: Tobey Maguire vs. James Franco, Spider-Man 3
WINNER: Sean Faris vs. Cam Gigandet, Never Back Down

I should've known. That whole movie was about fighting! I'm glad it won. I just went with Spidey 3 because that was an exceptionally cool fight.

BEST SUMMER MOVIE SO FAR
MY PICK: Iron Man
WINNER: Iron Man

No contest there.

BEST MALE PERFORMANCE
MY PICK: Will Smith, I Am Legend
WINNER: Will Smith, I Am Legend

That was one of Will's best roles. He really makes that movie.

BEST COMEDIC PERFORMANCE
MY PICK: Johnny Depp, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
WINNER: Johnny Depp, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

Naturally.

BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE
MY PICK: Michael Cera, Superbad
WINNER: Zac Efron, Hairspray

I'm not really sure what this award means.

BEST VILLAIN
MY PICK: Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men
WINNER: Johnny Depp, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

I suppose if anyone merits two awards, it's Johnny Depp.

BEST KISS
MY PICK: Daniel Radcliffe and Katie Leung, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
WINNER: Briana Evigan and Robert Hoffman, Step Up 2 the Streets

I only picked Harry Potter because I thought that was the funniest potential winner of the "Best Kiss" award.

BEST MOVIE
MY PICK: Juno
WINNER: Transformers

Holy shit. Overall, it was a pretty good show. Mike Myers was a good host. The Wayne's World comeback was fucking awesome (it was exactly as good as it was in the early 90's). And I scored a three out of nine. Funny that there was only nine awards (not counting Adam Sandler's lifetime achievement thing). I'm really amazed that there's no category for Best Song. This would be the ideal show for it. One, because they love to nominate stuff that would never get recognition at the Academy Awards, so they could nominate all the bullshit pop songs they wanted. And two, because they used to show music on this channel. Although, to their credit, they did throw in a couple of completely irrelevant live music performances by Coldplay and the Pussycat Dolls. I'd say the low point of the evening was when Seth Rogen and James Franco, in a seemingly unscripted moment, took out a bag of weed and smoked a J before presenting an award, and the directors in the booth were so flustered, they nervously stayed in a super wide shot for the whole thing, and cut to some useless reaction shots toward the end. Grow some balls, MTV.

I do like that there's an award show where Step Up 2 the Streets and Never Back Down both walk away with awards.

Cheers,
Diego

New Blog: Redbox Rentals.

I just started a new blog dedicated exclusively to my Redbox rentals. What the hell does this mean? Read it to find out.

Big D Pitchas: Redbox Rentals.

Cheers,
Diego