Friday, June 1, 2007

Open Letter to Jeffrey Katzenberg

From IMDb:

DreamWorks Animation plans to produce two more Shrek movies before shutting down the franchise, CEO Jeffrey Katzenberg has told the Australian newspaper The Age. "It's a finite story, has been from the beginning and I think that's part of its integrity, part of its strength, that we're not thinking this up as we go," he said in an interview with the Melbourne newspaper. "Ultimately we will come back to understand how Shrek arrived in that swamp. We will reveal his story." Although acknowledging that he is committed to making movies that will make money for DreamWorks' investors, Katzenberg maintained that he himself never thinks about money. "I've never done anything in my entire life for money. ... I'm amazingly disengaged from it, always have been. I probably would have done even better had I ever paid any attention to it. [His wealth is estimated at $800 million.] My partner David Geffen is a genius at it. He's worth a gajillion times more than me because he does pay attention to it -- he's brilliant at investing."

Now you listen to me, you son of a bitch. How dare you make a statement as stupid as "It's a finite story, has been from the beginning?" If there's anything this franchise doesn't have, it is both integrity and strength. And you are most definitely thinking every bit of it up as you go. That is why you brought in new writers when you decided you were going to make as many Shrek sequels as you possibly could. The only reason you are even making Shrek 4 and Shrek 5 is because you announced them after Shrek 2 (the single most profitable Dreamworks movie to date), and now that you're draining all magic from the franchise, you want to pretend that your motives are pure and artistically motivated. Just be honest, god dammit. As if anybody is going to believe that anyone during the making of the first Shrek ever uttered the phrase, "We see this as a five-movie series." You've never done anything in your entire life for money? Then why was there more than one Shrek? It's based on a children's book. You dumb fuck. I haven't seen this much shameless spinning since Walt Disney's proverbial grave after they released the trailer for Cinderella III.


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